Donna Louise here weeping tears of joy over my wedding day.
The minister asked everyone who’d shouted “I can” to line up and he’d listen to their reasons Arnie and I couldn’t be lawfully married. Before he could organize an inquisition (he seemed like the type who would), I took over.
One of Mama’s favorite Shakespeare quotes was, “Honesty is the best policy.” I had messed up big time.
I took Arnie’s hands in mine. “You’re a wonderful man. Anyone would be lucky to have your love. It’s okay you’re gay, but I’m not looking for that quality in a spouse…at least not now. You belong with Sean who loves you. And you love him too.”
I started to cry which messed up my eye make-up and gave me a ghoulish look. “Arnie, we only got here because I didn’t want you humiliated in front of those people who think gay isn’t okay. I want more than anything for you to be happy.”
He looked at me. “I don’t know what to say. Sean and I thought it would be better for me to marry you and then have the marriage annulled, rather than ruin your wedding day. You seemed to look forward to it so much. I wanted you to be happy.”
“You were planning an annulment?” I laughed. Great minds think alike.
“Donna Louise, what now?”
Sean pushed his way to the altar and took Arnie in his arms and kissed him. I said, “By the power vested in me, I pronounce you married.”
The minister butted in. “You can’t do that. It’s an abomination.”
Fern strode up the aisle and went toe-to-toe with the reverend. “Back away from my son and his spouse, you ignorant Bible thumper.”
The minister turned and ran toward the exit. “I’m calling the police. They’ll arrest the lot of you perverts.”
Trudy said, “Alright, fellow pervs, we have a reception to attend. See you at Arnie’s…and Sean’s place.”
We partied until sunrise Sunday morning and then all went to breakfast just like we did in the old days when we closed down the bars, except this time we all went home with the people we loved.*
Mama was right again.
Happy Halloween to my ghost and goblin friends and to all my dear readers.
*Don’t ask me who I went home with because I don’t kiss and tell…well, at least not right now.